Thursday, May 29, 2008

I WANT A JET

I want my own jet. I need a jet. I am a faith preacher so I need a jet to fit in with the other faith preachers. I don't think that I should have to fly commercial and sit next to some lost person that may draw the Anointing out of me, or some hungry soul that would pepper me with questions about God. I need to be rested when I arrive for my meetings. I know Jesus walked around like the people did but I'm sure that if he were here he would fly his own jet.
I also wants some armor bearers. I want them to meet me out in the parking lot and open my truck door. Hopefully a new Hummer, cause I'm a faith preacher.. I want my armor bearers to have those little walkie talkies like the Secret Service uses. I need an armor bearer to carry my Bible and to keep common church folks out of my hair so that they wont disturb the Anointing.
I also need a 18,000 square foot mansion to live in. It is very important to me to have all of these things cause I'm a faith preacher, and all the faith preachers live in mansions.
I want my own TV show too on TBN. I want to hang out with the Stars of Jesus and to be seen with them. This is what we faith preachers do the best, we hang around the Stars of Jesus. I wonder how I can do this? Hmmmmm. I know, I will ask people to be my covenant partners! They can send me their money, and I will say a prayer for them! That's it! Also, when I get invited to all the meetings, I will tell them that I am good ground and that if they will sow their best seed into my ministry, that they will become rich! WOW! Awesome idea! I need to get to work right away, before Jesus comes back and I miss my shot at the Big Time!

3 comments:

cullen said...

hahahahahahahahahaha dude that is so funny. You are loco!!!

oncefooled said...

I remeber quite vividly walking around Mr. C's birdie mountain compound in Ft. Worth, TX. as I looked around at all his buildings, air field, air conditioned church parking garage for the elite pastoral staff ( while the lowly churchies had to park in the searing heat. The Lord quietly spoke (okay, not audilbly). "Look around, see his kingdom, it is NOT my kingdom and great will it's fall be. My kingdom is not of man's making." That was 2 years ago! So my amigo, keep yo feet firmly planted on the rock cuz the crash is coming. I never heard of anyone being able to pull over in mid-air when there's engine trouble.Poor Mr. C, he's just bein picked on cuz he's pennycosty'all and all his co-whores. Gosh, he's givn us all a bum rap. satan just havin a field day cuz these apostates smear the name of Christ and the world sneers.

John Edwards said...

Hey OnceFooled.....nice to hear from ya! Come back more often. John